I made it through week one of my "Insanity" workouts. Unbelievable. Frankly, I amazed even myself. And the fact that I got up this morning at 6:15AM to begin week TWO is even more amazing. I am totally motivated right now and can't explain it, other than I am tired of being chubby, unhealthy and uncomfortable with my body.
I suppose my motivation also comes from the fact that I've lost a few pounds, and I can absolutely TELL, yes I can, that I my cardiovascular abilities are already improving. Next Monday, I will do the Insanity "Fit Test," a test involving a series of soul-crushing, life-sucking exercises that make you want to lay down on the floor and scream (if you have the breath available and are not puking). I was not too "fit" on my first attempt, which obviously is expected. But I already know I will see improvement next week. When you work this hard every day, it is inevitable. There is no way around it. I WILL get healthier.
And I've decided that I want to be an EATER, damn it. The way I see it, there are two camps. There are people who exercise so that they can eat. And then there are those who don't want to exercise (or just don't DIG it, I guess) and don't seem to mind depriving themselves of food all the time. The whole deprivation thing is just not healthy for me - mentally. I would rather work my ass off six days a week, sweating and wheezing until I am practically crying, just so that if I want to have a latte and a scone or maybe a big cheeseburger on occasion, I don't have to worry. And I can eat plenty every day - plenty of healthy food that I love. I don't have to do the 1200 calorie a day thing. I don't have to freak out if someone gives me a sandwich with cheese on it. I don't have to "bring my own" gross diet dish while everyone else eats spaghetti and I just end up looking weird. I'm sorry but that is just a misery that I am not willing to bear anymore. Feh! Not going to do it. Done.
My diet this last week was for the most part, very clean. And strange thing is, I enjoyed it. If I am not being all militant about carbs, I am a pretty happy camper. If I can have awesome greek yogurt, berries, tomatoes and spinach, low fat dressing, chicken breasts and quinoa, and my favorite whole wheat english muffins with eggs and turkey, I am DAMNED happy. On Saturday, I made myself a very healthy, super thin crust pizza (two pieces only, mind you) with turkey pepperoni, part skim moz, tomatoes, peppers - it was fab, and less about 5oo calories for those two pieces. I realized that I can eat healthy, and still have most of the stuff that I truly enjoy.
I've been trying very hard to cut down on my artificial sweetener consumption - it was WAY out of control, in my opinion. I've been doing very well - I am using just regular sugar (cubes - I bought CUBES so that I wouldn't do any heaping tablespoons...) and I also bought that "Stevia In the Raw" just to try the bitter root out. Turns out the rumors are true - that stuff has a weird bitter aftertaste. But I soldier through... Or I just do part sugar, and one teaspoon of Splenda, as opposed to 3 teaspoons of Splenda or two packets of Sweet & Low, etc. It's working. And I am finding that things just really don't need to be so damned sweet.
Okay, that is all I know right now. Wish me luck as tomorrow is the "Pure Cardio" Insanity workout. One of the girls in the video actually almost throws up and a few of them lay down. It's a crazy series but don't worry - I am going at my own pace. And I feel GREAT.
Now I am off to buy some liver. Gross, I know, but I love it and I am in desperate need of IRON right now... TOM and all....