Friday, June 29, 2012

The Hurry

Weight loss and getting healthy always seems to be a "hurry" kind of thing for me.  I get a little obsessive about the rate of my weight loss, a few ounces gained overnight, the fact that I'm not going to be "thin enough" by a date certain - that kind of stuff.  So when I started this time, I began down that same path but whoooaaa - It seems I am playing a different game this time. 

Talk about SLOW.  I think my metabolism has been smothered in a high-viscosity molasses that has gunked up the cogs so much that it seems I might lose a pound every couple weeks.  Or maybe I am just 43 and shit is slowing down.  I never really believed that whole "as you age it gets harder to lose weight" thing but uh, I'm believing it now.  Seriously, this has been a real wake up call to me.  And of course, it pisses me off because I am not being instantly gratified. 

But this maddening development has forced me to accept the process for what it really is - It is a lifestyle change, not a diet.  I am not just going to lose 40 pounds and then go back to my old patterns.  I am changing the way I operate on a daily basis. 

It is also forcing me to realize that every choice I make today, no matter how small, will determine where I am in the future, say, one year from now.  Sure, I could get mad and throw in the towel because "all this hard work isn't paying off" or "why bother, it's not making a difference, anyway."   But that is just stupid when I stop to consider the long term health effects of what I'm doing, rather than short term gratuituous pay offs of "looking better" or fitting into my thin clothes.  I know in my heart that if I continue doing what I am doing, every day, without giving up, I will be far better off in 365 days than I am today.  It is a FACT. 

So for now, I'm sticking to it.  I am ignoring the naysayers and the negative people.  (Tell me, why is it that totally overweight, out of shape people think they have a right to advise me on what they believe to be the flaws in my diet?  WHY?) I am committed to my way of healthy eating because HEY all you uninformed, self-appointed critics - I have lost 8 pounds and several inches in 3 weeks - I must be doing something right, huh?  I am just sticking with what I know, based on my personal experience with my own body, what works for me.  And it IS working.  It's just slow. 

I shall be the turtle, not the hare, in this race to save my life and my sagging ass.  Today, I am accepting that I am a damned turtle and though it is incredibly frustrating at times, if I stay on course, I can be absolutely certain that I am going to WIN in the end.  Others may blow by me in this race but I really can't get distracted by that.  As long as I stay the course, I am winning. GO TURTLES!!  And remember....

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Lol! I needed to hear this! You are so right on! Why do I always want instant visible results? I am going to start keeping better track of where I am at (weight-wise, inches, etc) with the idea that I will be comparing myself to it A YEAR FROM NOW. I am 44 btw and it is good to know it is not easy for others, either. I tend to compare myself to the perfect-seeming people instead of the ones on the couch. Or how about I don't compare myself to ANYONE! Hey there is a goal....GO TURTLES!!